Bird Box (2018) Review

"But under no circumstances are you allowed to take off your blindfold."

-Malorie

Bird Box follows Malorie (Sandra Bullock) and two children, Boy (Julian Edwards) and Girl (Vivien Lyra Blair), as they embark on a dangerous journey down a river.  In this post-apocalyptic world, strange creatures roam.  If you see them, you go crazy and kill yourself.  Malorie and the kids have to wear blindfolds for the entire trip if they want to survive.  We also get plenty of flashbacks to the early days of the apocalypse. 

What Works:

I really like the premise behind Bird Box.  I was a big fan of A Quiet Place, which is a very similar movie where the characters can't make any noise.  In Bird Box they can't use their eyes.  It's a fun idea with tons of potential and we do get some interesting sequences out of it.

Sandra Bullock and Trevante Rhodes both do a solid job with their roles.  Right off the bat, we are introduced to Malorie with a monologue to the kids.  She comes off as a total badass in her attempts to strike fear into the hearts of the kids.  It's a great way to introduce her character.  Rhodes, on the other hand, is a much kinder optimist.  The two have great chemistry and I like their scenes together.  They're both competent, likable people and that makes them easy to root for.

I love the first act of the film.  I already mentioned Malorie's opening monologue, but when we get the first flashback, we go to the day the world ends for Malorie.  As the chaos unfolds, we get a very exciting sequence with Malorie and her sister, Jess (Sarah Paulson), driving through the streets.  It's a lot of fun and an excellent way to get the film moving.

What Sucks:

Bird Box is a very frustrating film for a few reasons.  First, the characters make a lot of extremely stupid decisions that lessened my enjoyment of the film.  When characters make poor decisions without a good reasons in survival movie, I get very frustrated.  

There were also many gaps in logic throughout the film.  There were moments where characters were doing something a certain way when there were clearly better options.  For example, when Malorie reaches the rapids where they supposedly have to take their blindfolds off the make it through, why didn't they just go ashore and walk from there?  They were very close to their destination at that point, why take the risk of going through the rapids?

As I mention above, Bird Box had a lot of potential, but it doesn't use all of it.  Supposedly, the creatures in this movie made you see your worst fears or your loved ones, but we don't ever get to see what that entails.  We never get to see what the characters who do look see.  I'm not talking about seeing the creatures themselves, I'm fine with that staying a mystery, but what is actually making everyone commit suicide?  The film never explores some of the ideas they suggest, which is a shame.

Apart from Bullock and Rhodes, I didn't give a crap about any of the characters in the film.  They were all underdeveloped, useless, or unlikable, if not all three.  I felt nothing watching them die.  What's also frustrating is John Malkovich's character, who you are supposed to dislike, but by the end of the film, you realize he was right about almost everything.  These characters were simply not handled properly by the filmmakers.

Finally, I don't like kids, babies, and pregnancy in general, especially in movies.  It's a subject matter that is an important part of this story, which I wasn't thrilled about, but whatever, I can get over it.  The main problem with kids in movies is that child actors usually aren't great and the kids are pretty useless and cause unnecessary problems for the other characters.  That is 100% the case here, especially with Girl.  She's my least favorite character in the movie and I didn't care about her or Boy in the slightest.  Their complete inability to follow directions just frustrated me even more.

Verdict:

Bird Box has just enough positives for me to recommend it, but it's close.  I found large portions of the film incredibly frustrating due to poor character decision's, useless characters, and wasted potential.  The first act is fantastic, Bullock and Rhodes are great, and there are some really fun sequences and moments throughout.  Ironically, Bird Box is worth a watch, but just barely.

 6/10: Okay